Identify Your Gifts & Strengths

Imagine that within you is a gift that when expressed will bring you and the people around you a great deal of joy. And imagine that one of the master keys to happiness and inner fulfilment was to discover and start using that gift. You’d be pretty keen to find it what is was right?


The idea of us each having a gift was something that I discovered when I took an honest look at what brought me and others the most joy in my life. I noticed that their were certain moments in which I experienced a deep sense of fulfilment and inner peace and that those moments happened repeatedly whenever I was in a specific situation and able to allow certain qualities to emerge from me. So I developed this following exercise, which I have subsequently used with my clients to help them discover their outer gift – what exactly will bring them and others the greatest fulfilment and joy and their inner gift – what qualities from within are waiting to be expressed through their outer gift. What’s more the process that I use also helps to identify the conditions that are necessary in order to allow this happen. As more and more people used this discovery process and started to focus on using their gifts whenever they could, their fulfilment and happiness levels increased substantially. It’s not a panacea for happiness and life, but it is an important part of the jigsaw for transforming your life


How to Discover Your Gifts


1. What is your outer gift?


Think about what it is you love to do that is of benefit to others as well as bringing you a deep sense of fulfilment. If you had no money worries whatsoever, what would you be doing simply because of the joy it brings to you and others?

One of the things I love to do most is to ‘inspire people to fulfil their health, healing and personal growth potential.’ Write your own answer down in a journal


2. What is your inner gift?


When you are doing what you love, what are the exact qualities that you are allowing to emerge from within you? This takes you much deeper and reveals your inner gift


For example my response is ‘I am allowing wisdom, insight and compassion to emerge through me.’ Write your own answer down in a journal


3. What liberates your gifts?


How do you need to be, in order to experience your inner and outer gift? What needs to happen in order for you to experience these? Write your own answer down in a journal

For example my own answer was ‘By being present, relaxed and open’


So using my own responses, I discovered that


  • My outer gift is to inspire people to fulfil their health, healing and personal growth potential
  • My inner gifts waiting to emerge through me are wisdom, insight and compassion
  • I will experience and bring forth my gifts by being present, relaxed and open


When you do this work you might at first struggle to identify your gifts, I did initially. The key is not to rush the process, but to keep playing with your answers until they feel right. For each of the three questions you will know when you have discovered the right answer because you will feel a warmth and sense of expansion in your body. You will just know that you have hit the bull’s eye so to speak. Another good way to do this work is to do it with a friend or partner. Get them to ask the questions and to write down your answers. Alternatively give it a break for a few days and then come back to it. Being as relaxed as you can be whilst doing it makes it much easier for your truth to reveal itself to you


Here is a how to discover your inner gift dialogue that I had with a retired client of mine called John.


Me:      What do you absolutely love to do that also benefits others?

John:     I love to take care of my grandchildren

Me:      When you are taking care of your grandchildren, what are the exact qualities that you are allowing to emerge through you?

John:     I am allowing kindness, love and fun to emerge through me

Me:      How do you need to be, in order to experience your inner and outer gift?

John:     I need to relax and be present


So you’ve discovered your outer and inner gift and how to access it, what next? Two things 1) you allocate more of your time, energy and life to situations in which you are expressing your gift and 2) you start developing the skills that enable your gifts to emerge, in my case and John’s case the skill was present moment awareness.



Exercise: Identify Your Strengths


A strength is something that you are good at, comes naturally to you and energises you when you use it.  Research has found that those who live life in accordance with their strengths and talents are happier and fulfilled than those who don’t.


Whilst you might be aware of some of your strengths, most people in my experience don’t have that much clarity around them. To help you identify your strengths I recommend using one of the following strengths assessment tools.  The VIA Strengths questionnaire, which can be found at, (this is free) and Realise 2.0, which is the one I use with my own patients at


Now go to discover your values






LinkedIn Facebook
To contact us call +44 20 3239 4118
or e-mail us at